hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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