There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Sober January is a disaster.
cat food counts as protein by the way
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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