Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
