where does the pee come out of this thing
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
