Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize