so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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