it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
