Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Randomize
