Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
