Non-Jews are for practice
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
