sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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