yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
