Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
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