I am spending my child support on dildos
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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