i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
