She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
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