Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize