Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
