Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
