I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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