Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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