I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
