ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i will never coherently bang her
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Your penis caused this!
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