I can tuck mytits in my pants
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
