I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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