dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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