windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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