WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
