absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
