I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
