nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
