so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
