what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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