Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
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