no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
