True but thats because hes a fetus.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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