Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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