"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
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