bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Randomize
