dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
