My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
