So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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