What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
