I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
