Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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