I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
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