Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
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