there were more penises there than on chat roulette
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
