If i come over, it means nothing
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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