He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
