he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
